Something I learned from an excellent real estate coach named Brian Moses is the importance of reflecting on things that go well and things that don’t. The emphasis was on things that didn’t go well, but it can be applied to positive situations as well.
Brian talked about filling notebook after notebook with what he called “Autopsies.” He would autopsy situations after they were done, in writing, to learn what he could do better next time when the situation presented itself again.
This is based on the professional wisdom that at a certain point, situations we encounter in business aren’t really new. My father-in-law talked about this during his last visit with us. He spoke about how employees that come into his business fit into archetypes and he can predict how well they’ll turn out in many cases because he’s seen and hired and fired the same guy (not literally) before.
Whenever I have a deal die or I have a lead that I feel should have converted but didn’t or when I lose a listing appointment, I autopsy it.
In practice, this basically looks like journaling about the situation. But more specifically, I ask myself where I could have done better, where I was at fault. On further reflection, It’s usually evident where I messed up.
The one that comes to mind is a listing appointment from last summer. They were sort of an odd couple, around my age, and the house was a bit unusual. Mostly because there were something like a half-dozen or more cats living there. There was one bedroom of the five that was actually for the cats.
The people were nice enough. He was a bit more forward, she a bit more reserved. I quickly grew comfortable with them because of our closeness in age. We toured the home, sat at the table, and I went through my presentation. Prior to the presentation, I felt that we had established rapport. I especially felt that way with the man.
Well, I have the unfortunate habit of vulgar speech. It’s rarely a problem in my professional life, but it’s a character handicap inherited from my parents and perfected in the Marines that I’d rather not have. Because I felt especially comfortable with the man, and to a lesser degree with the woman but still comfortable, at some point I began speaking freely as I would with friends.
At the time, it felt pretty natural. There were no adverse reactions, and there may have even been some reciprocity.
I followed up a couple times as it was just a matter of time for them to list. Then one day, she told me that her friend recommended she work with someone and she decided to take her friend’s recommendation. She wasn’t bitter about it, and she was obviously forthcoming and didn’t just ignore me. I asked her point blank if there was something more I could have done to win her business, or, if there was anything I could have done better.
She paused and seemed to consider it, then convincingly said, “No.”
I was a little pissed about the situation. It was in the bag. $12k, gone.
Of course, I hung up congenially enough. But I was hurting.
I thought of Brian. So, I opened a Word doc and wrote through it. It was informative for me. Similar to seeking direction the way I described in yesterday’s post, this is a way that I can uncover stuff that’s holding me back, stuff that I otherwise won’t notice that I’m coming up against.
Here’s the Autopsy Report below as an example:
Autopsy Report
(The Person’s Name Was Here)
I interviewed for the listing and she said she was going to clean the house and paint and get her shit out before listing in about a month. I followed up with her after 1 week via text saying, “Just checking in with you. Were you able to connect with Attorney _______ about the capital gains tax question?” She responded saying that she hadn’t had a chance to call him but would hopefully by the end of the week. I asked if she had any other questions or things I could assist with. She said, “No not yet. I’m working on packing and cleaning/painting.”
I followed up again two weeks later on 6/21/22 asking her how the painting was going. She responded “Hi, I’m doing good. I’ve just decided to go with a realtor that a friend of mine just used, but thank you for your time and advice.”
I asked her if there were any other differentiators besides her friend’s recommendation that helped her decide. She said no, it was just the recommendation.
Damn!
I could have communicated more often. I let two weeks slip by before I reached back out again. By then it was too late. How do I continue to add value while seller leads are in nurture mode? I didn’t establish sufficient trust for her anyway. I won over the boyfriend, but I didn’t win her over.
I swore profusely while I presented to them because I felt comfortable. That was a mistake.
My communication is limited to texts and emails on Tuesdays. While that’s a step in the right direction as far as what I’ve otherwise done previously (structure), it’s not a very upbeat rhythm. I need to increase communication, but do it systematically.
What else can I do to add value and help to build trust with sellers? Brian would say that I should have left with the client docs signed. Some of these sellers aren’t ready to sign though. I stumbled a little through the presentation too I remember because the listing sheets were the CloudCMA listing sheets and I wasn’t familiar with where some of the details are located on the page. I need to know them like I know my phone number. Even if there was some other factor, she wouldn’t say it. If there was some other factor, she may not even be aware of it. It’s more unconscious. Trust. You increase trust by increasing communication. But how do you increase communication with somebody without coming across as over-the-top? Maybe over-the-top would have been preferable to the bi-weekly texter…
She tells me she needs a month to get it ready to list. She finds a new realtor somewhere between week 1 and week 3. I could have called last week. I don’t call. I could have called ever. I could send her listings as they come on market. I could send them the digital pdf version of the report. I could increase the fear and tension rather than putting them at ease. How? By increasing motivation to list sooner because of market conditions worsening. Because of buyers disappearing and becoming more particular as time goes by.
The fact of the matter is, she felt no problem with taking another realtor over me and not letting me know. She didn’t care about letting me know because what I was delivering was a commodity service. There was no real relationship there. Nothing to speak of. Now, whether or not this is somebody that you would get lunch with, this is somebody that’s in the market to sell a $400k home. Transactional. She found you (number one) on her own, but then when push came to shove she preferred a referral from a friend of hers who’d just had a positive experience with someone else. You should use your referrals and Success Stories more in your listing presentations.
You could ask people who you’ve just helped if they know anyone who’s thinking of buying or selling in the next few months. Other agents do this, and this is part of the reason why they find themselves in these situations and you don’t. You have to learn how to ask for the referral.
Pay attention to who gets this listing. Irrespective, note that this is something that you do not know how to do and need to learn how to do. This is a weakness of yours, not a quality of your character.
Now don’t beat yourself up. God wants you to learn. Like Yoda said last night, “The greatest teacher, failure is.” Use it.
That’s a good example. I was able to uncover some ideas and insight that I wouldn’t have otherwise. Furthermore, I felt somewhat better after I wrote this out. I put my arms around it, identified where I fell short, and committed to not making those same mistakes twice. To me, this is the work of a pro. We all make mistakes. The question is whether or not we learn from them.
Hundred-K Journey 
[…] f-it and going for it with the hopes that maybe it will all come together. And if not, I’ll autopsy it and get better with my process — especially around these strange leads I’m not used […]
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