Never Judge the Lead


Here’s how I almost threw away a $1,250,000 lead.

The day before yesterday, I showed a $725,000 house to a buyer I connected with through Zillow.

I’ve primarily done referral-based business for the last three years, with some early help from Zillow and Bold Leads. We recently decided to throw some money at Zillow because we’ve heard from so many people (watched so many people) significantly augment their business with it.

That being said, I don’t love it. I get the value, but the forced intro, the expectation that I’m going to get you your appointment in 45 seconds, the expectation of seeing a home together before meeting in person to talk and form a client relationship — these things all go against the grain of what I’ve done for a while.1

So, I got connected with this guy. He seemed a little terse or timid (couldn’t tell) on the phone, but I hung up, scheduled the appointment with the list broker, called him back to confirm, and sent him a subsequent email with the showing packet.

He doesn’t respond to the email… Alright. Whatever.

The next day, I finish a late-morning listing appointment and head to the general area where I’ll meet this guy.2 I have lunch. Then I called to confirm the appointment.3 He doesn’t answer.

At this point, I’m saying f-it and going for it with the hopes that maybe it will all come together. And if not, I’ll autopsy it and get better with my process — especially around these strange leads I’m not used to.4

I pull up. Nice house, amazing view, excellent plot of land. I’m pulling up the long driveway after driving up the long road, and two cars are in the driveway. A man and a woman (the listing broker is a woman), a late-90s drop-top Mercedes SLK, and a black Chrysler 300. Here goes.

Turns out, the Chrysler is here from the owner, and the SLK is the buyers’, and it’s him and his wife. They’re friendly and pleasant. All is good.

The other agent shows up. She’s a stud that’s been doing it for 100 years. She walks us in around up and down and talks the whole time. Little for me to say other than my little noises affirming what she’s saying and occasionally chiming in.

We finish up, say goodbye to the list broker, and go to depart. He thanks me for my time and getting them in there, shakes my hand, and says take care. The wife shakes my hand and says it was nice to meet me.

What would you think or feel when you got into your car and they were already driving away?

Did they really just want to see the house and are otherwise not interested in anything? Did I not say enough, or did I say something wrong or something that bothered them? Did I seem desperate?

Mind you, the showing was positive. All was good, or as good as one could expect, regarding establishing rapport with people you met in the last thirty minutes. But there was no, “We’re going to think it over,” or, “What do you think?” or, “We’re going to chat and let’s touch base later.” I had to insert something to that end and was met with no affirmation in return other than them saying it was nice to meet me.

So, I’m driving away thinking I just wasted a goddamn afternoon on this. Not to mention money and resources.

Something Brian Moses taught me was to never judge the lead. He hammered that, and I didn’t understand it at first. As time has gone on, I’ve grown to understand it more.

I knew these people just fucking blew me off. Still, I persisted.

Internet, or the lack of it available there, was a concern they mentioned. A large one. The wife works from home, and the husband owns a company and needs to be accessible even when he’s not at work.

Best you can do up there is satellite internet. The listing broker texted me later and said she spoke with a neighbor, and they said they had a high-speed provider. I had the thought of suggesting Starlink as well. So, I put together a simple email explaining that I couldn’t verify the availability of the Internet provider online but that they still may be worth a call. I mentioned, too, that Starlink was another option that appeared to be available, and I included screenshots and links and such.

No reply.

At this point, I expected that he wouldn’t reply to the email. I planned to call him yesterday to follow up on it and get some feedback.

That I did. I called him yesterday afternoon before I left with my family for a weekend getaway. No answer.

I left him a voicemail with something to the effect of, “Hey ________, it’s Sam. Give me a call when you get a second? 603-____-_____. Thanks.”

I expected I wouldn’t hear from him.

As we drove north to Lake Winnipesaukee, I got a call back. Spoke with him and he told me that, while the house was interesting and had beautiful views and a nice lot, it needed too much work. He explained some more about his reasoning and told me to let him know if something came up that checked those boxes or if the price on this one trended downward.

Fuck me, right?

It was fine. Everything was fine. But I about talked myself out of wanting to deal with this guy. I had begun to convince myself that he was just a jerk who didn’t care about wasting my time and didn’t even have the respect to call me (or respond to me) to let me know he wasn’t interested.

I was wrong. Never judge the lead. That’s. a $700,000+ buyer lead and a $500,000+ seller lead. That’s a $1,250,000+/- lead!

And I was about to flush it because I judged the lead. Thanks, Brian.5

  1. I’m trying to be open-minded in the interest of generating new business and leaving no lead source unexploited. ↩︎
  2. My immediate marketplace has next-to-no Zillow availability. So, I bought some in a small city about half an hour from my office. Not a place where I love to work, but the only viable option to experiment with Zillow. ↩︎
  3. This is typically not something I do. I want to show up and have them not be there so I can have a justifiable position of what-the-fuck for when we next talk because it puts me in more of a powerful position in the relationship. Unless they’re very callous (or if they just never respond again), they’re typically apologetic and regretful and experience the burden of reciprocity. In this situation, I didn’t want to drive another 20 minutes farther away and have this guy not even be there. Mainly because the showing was assisted, and I’d be wasting the listing broker’s time as well as my own. ↩︎
  4. This is something I’ve decided to do anyway. I need to qualify these buyers on the phone after I make the appointment. I need to develop a list of qualifying questions and run through that every time. They’re not warm, referral-based leads like I’m used to. To them, I’m the equivalent of a telemarketer, somebody who gets them their real estate showing and unlocks the door. ↩︎
  5. This is not an extreme or unusual example. This happens to me fairly often. Sometimes, people don’t fit into the mold of behavior that I expect them to. I trust this will happen less and less as I gain more experience, but it still gets me. How much money have you lost in commission income from judging the lead? ↩︎
Never Judge the Lead

Short Walks

Sometimes you have to push. Today was one of those days. We had a large, unexpected shift occur today in our company. It’s very heavy and requires much processing.

Then the listing agent on a rehab-loan deal is all but begging me to convince my buyer client to let the seller stay for a few days after closing. This never seems to go well, and the agent took three weeks to contact me about it. Too late. I suggested we hold back $25,000 in escrow and then credit the buyer $300 per day after the weekend if the seller’s not out.

He called back a couple hours later to say that they figured out a way to make it all work and we don’t need to hold back the money.

Sometime in this same time period, my assistant called, frantic, because the final payoff hadn’t been received by the title company on another deal (Nightmare Deal) and the bank wouldn’t release it to anyone other than the seller. Closing is the day after tomorrow.

Mrs. Seller said the mortgage isn’t in her name and they won’t release it to her either. Mr. Seller is traveling for work and I can’t get ahold of him. To make things worse, the HOA contacted the title company in the meantime and told them that the outstanding compliance issue with the unit hadn’t been remedied yet either. Think we’re going to close on Friday?

Stress Fest.

A sense of overwhelm. The company issue is what clouded my thinking and feelings more than anything today. Couple that with new fires on two of these soon-to-be-closed transactions and I wanted to bury my face in a pillow and scream.

I have a new listing that wasn’t supposed to go live for another three weeks, but the sellers let me know they want to go public asap when I saw them the day before yesterday. So, now I’m working until after midnight to get it prepped to push the button tomorrow.

Finally, my other listing is in super rough condition and the showing feedback is indicative of that. New-listing-and-maybe-we-won’t-be-able-to-sell-it fears. Ever get those?

I had dinner with my family and tried not to obsessively think about the work thing. Dinner was good. My wife listened to me while my little children interrupted me repeatedly to talk with her about nothing.

She suggested we go for a walk. Just a short one, knowing that I had a lot of work still to do. It sounded like a refreshing idea after four hours in the car, difficult news, and firefighting the deals.

We walked, and I left my phone at home. My two-year-old son was riding his balance bike, as was my very recently turned four-year-old daughter. Watching them was when I first felt a flicker of a smile on my face. Then I noticed that at one point in the relatively short walk, the tension vanished. It was just gone.

I didn’t will it away. I didn’t figure out the solution to the myriad problems of Day In The Life of a Realtor. I just walked with my little family. And it went away.

I frequently spiral into this overwhelming state. I mean that relatively. A few times a month, probably.

But it’s the kind of thing that happens to a guy like me who’s doing things like these. This work can be really high-stress, and if we don’t find effective ways of dealing with that stress, it will kill us.

It will kill me.

And I know there are more stressful situations to be in. Trust me, I get it.

But it’s all relative to the person experiencing it. I have to take care of myself so I can continue to grow and evolve. That means short walks with my family even when there’s a ton of shit to do.

Short Walks

High Stress, High Stakes

Dealing with difficult people during difficult times is unfortunately something that characterizes the role of the real estate professional. High stress, high stakes. And let’s be honest, sometimes the situations themselves don’t really seem that intense.

Looking at a $400k condo +/- negotiating an extension deadline for a financing contingency and a closing. Big fucking deal.

But in reality, the sellers I represent already got buyers to the closing before the buyer breached contract and bailed. Here we are, sold it again, made it to the eleventh hour, and the buyer agent is requesting a second extension of the financing deadline.

If that were all, it would be annoying, maybe frustrating. Add to these kinds of situations marital separations, pending foreclosure and auction, looming bankruptcy, or loss of job or loved one — suddenly, these apparently basic situations and negotiations are incredibly high stress, high stakes.

And it’s our job to show up. To stay even-keeled. To be the objective one that has their shit together and also knows what’s going on so we can manage the situation as best we can.

Takes practice. But we get better at it. We get better at recognizing what’s our ego and what’s actually in the best interest of the client. What needs to be said, what should be said, what doesn’t need to be said, and what shouldn’t be said. We learn to let ourselves have fun with the draft email but delete most of it and wait until the morning to revise it again if needed and actually send it.

This is one of the skills that makes us good at what we do. It’s where we can be of immense value or significant detriment to the people we serve.

High Stress, High Stakes